Why One Wife Now Chooses To Shop Alone

Here’s a proof of what can happen when a woman drags her highly disinterested husband or boyfriend along when shopping. This letter was sent by a British Hypermart to a customer in Oxford: Dear Mrs Murray, While we thank you for your valued patronage and use of our store’s loyalty card, the manager of the store is considering banning you and your family from shopping with us, unless your husband stops his antics. Below is a list of just some offenses over the past few months, all verified by our surveillance cameras: * 15 Jun: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people’s trolleys when they weren’t looking. * 2 Jul: Set all alarm clock in Hardware’s to go off at five-minute intervals. * 14 Aug: Moved a “Caution – Wet Floor” sign on a carpeted area. * 4 Oct: Look right into the security camera and used it as a mirror to pick his nose. * 3 Dec: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme. * 18 Dec: Hid in a clothing rack and yelled “Pick me! Pick me!”. * 23 Dec: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, then yelled very loudly “There is no toilet paper here!”. Yours Sincerely, Store...

Dissolvable bikini in action.

Update for this one… Get Revenge…. This is a video that shows the dissolvable bikini in action. Disclaimer: This video contains nudity and is NOT SAFE FOR WORK or anyone under the age of 18. Click here to see...

MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE

NICKNAMES If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah. If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes. EATING OUT When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it’s only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back. When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators. MONEY A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t need but it’s on sale. BATHROOMS A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel. The average number of items in the typical woman’s bathroom is 337. o A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items. ARGUMENTS A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument. FUTURE A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. SUCCESS A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. MARRIAGE A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t. A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, but she does. DRESSING UP A woman will...

90% of US paper money contains traces of cocaine

On Sunday, the American Chemical Society, a nonprofit scientific society chartered by Congress, released a study claiming that up to 90 percent of U.S. paper money contains traces of cocaine. Of the 5 countries studied, The U.S. and Canada had the highest levels tested, with China and Japan ranking lowest, from 12 to 20 percent contamination levels. Scientists are reporting that cocaine is present in up to 90 percent of paper money in the United States, particularly in large cities such as Baltimore, Boston, and Detroit. The scientists found traces of cocaine in 95 percent of the banknotes analyzed from Washington, D.C., alone. What does that...

Squirrel Hams it up in Candid Shot

The couple had set the timer on their camera while posing at a lakeside in a national park in Canada. Just as they were about to be captured on camera the cheeky squirrel popped up in the foreground and stole the show. The picture was taken at the side of the stunning Lake Minnewanka in Banff National Park, Canada. Mrs Brandts said: “We had our camera set up on some rocks and were getting ready to take the picture when this curious little ground squirrel appeared, became intrigued with the sound of the focusing camera and popped right into our shot.” The picture was submitted to the website of America’s National Geographic magazine. ‘It was a once in a lifetime moment – we were laughing about this little guy for days!’ said Mrs...

Dog house costs more than median price for an American home

Paris Hilton likes tiny little toy size dogs. But those toy size dogs live in Paris Hilton’s dog house – that is nothing like a toy. Paris Hilton’s dog house has two floors and is thoroughly pink. Downstairs is the lounging and relaxing area from the stress of being Paris Hilton’s dogs. Upstairs is the sleeping area and a closet for her pups many different outfits. Tinkerbell, Marilyn Monroe, Prince Baby Bear, Harajuku, Dolce and Prada, have to love the dog mansion. It was finished by famed interior decorator Faye Resnick. The dog house has Philippe Starck furniture, heat, a/c and a crystal chandelier… Paris Hilton’s dog house is estimated to have cost around...